Well since that last post in 2016, life and death has happened. About halfway through those years from 2016-2022, I lost my son, my Matthew — too soon, too sadly. He left us all behind: wife, 2 daughters and a son and a wee baby girl who would be born 3 months after he died. We get through our days now, better than 2 years or 1 year ago, – but most days, along with joyful memories, there are moments when it is hard to breathe when the reality surfaces and we crumble. I will write more when I have better wits about me.
Once again, I have this entire home to live in – alone. I am gathering up the feathers which were left behind and figuring out the best way to recycle them, and myself in this new role of sole occupant. It’s a good change, a timely one, and an exciting one. I am sort of savoring this process of taking back my time, my privacy, and my focus. All of these rooms which I can again occupy. All of the space I can free up in my bedroom where the detritus of my life has been stored… New beginnings.
Christmas and the end of year have always posed interesting challenges. The “forced march” through the holidays – self-applied pressure to not forget anything, anyone, any previous practice…..It can be draining. Often the most relaxing times are after the main event, when there are still displays like the lights at San Antonio Riverwalk to be enjoyed – at a
leisurely pace with no other mandatory activities. It was nice that the weather was cold enough for scarves and jackets and that the walkways were crowded with people making merry. Beautiful landscaping — surely more and better than on previous years made it even more interesting the gardener in me. As did the earlier-in-the-afternoon visit to the San Antonio Zoo, another all-time favorite.
I am blessed with exuberance. Not sure why it is easy for me to be enthusiastic, but it seems to be part of my nature. Of course I am also good at doom and gloom when things get crazy…… I am enjoying the yard and the 2 community gardens so much this spring. With the help of my son and his wife, the (4) 5×10 raised beds became a reality in the yard, and now they are full of veggies…Another new bed (about 13X19) is planted with potatoes, eggplants and tomatoes and the newly turned of triangle behind the shed holds peppers and tomatoes. The beds are plain pine and are made from 2x8s.
The beds have grown nicely and we’ve been gradually pulling the cool weather crops and replacing them with summer stuff. Today, I harvested the last of the broccoli and pulled the plants. The challenge in this yard is all the big trees and their shadows. In order to get these beds here, I had to first transplant years of perennials elsewhere…..and give some away.
Well, not sure where all the time has gone — but y’know living can get in the way of life sometimes. Many gardens have come and gone. Many family dramas have angsted their way through and over the best intentions of having a creative blog outlet, crafted with joy and personal satisfaction. Oh well. today is a new day and the verge of a new year. It is the evening before New Years eve 2014. Already. zoom. The only other post I have in this blog is the unfortunate “First Post” — from Baguio, Philippines.. A long chugging haul up the 3rd world hills, past washouts and poverty to the cool mountain city with kids dreaming about riding horses and eating fresh strawberries.
Well that didn’t happen. In actuality, on day one there, a sister-in-law was robbed of her cash, the family’s passports and her handbag and most of the visit found the kids and I in the car in a parking garage while the victims got lip service from the local corrupt police. The good news was that we drove home in daylight and could navigate the washed out mountains much better than in the foggy night time. Just another day in paradise. Christmas 2009 – almost 5 years ago to the day.
This is my first post, this photo was taken on a recent trip to Baguio, in the Philippine mountains